The Lost Boys Epidemic

5:37 PM


                         The Lost Boys Epidemic

 

                                       “But where do you live mostly now?"

                                                     "With the lost boys."

                                                          "Who are they?"

    " They are the children who fall out of their perambulators when the nurse is looking the other way. If they are not claimed in seven days they are sent far away to the Neverland to defray expenses. I'm captain."

                                           "What fun it must be!"- Peter Pan


     “Man, I was about to blast ‘em last night, I was,” bragged the young guy behind me. “Man, I needs to get me some more blasters.”
 Sighing inwardly, examining the newly formed line of freckles on my right arm, while wincing at the growing sunburn on my left, I prayed that this line would move forward just a little more quickly. It must be sheer desperation to be standing in a line of at least 700 people for a job at a solar company in Neenach, California. Neenach! What a name for this one horse town! No, that’s not true. There are at least four, I thought to myself, as I gazed to the ranch directly north of me.          
The conversation behind me continued. Either they were ignoring the private audience they were giving to those lucky enough to be next to them in line, or they just couldn’t be bothered. As they began to delve into the sexual fantasies of “The Dragon,” a person I could only assume was Boy #1’s ever so fortunate girlfriend, I shifted uncomfortably in my four inch heels. What was I doing wearing four inch heels in the middle of all this gravel and desert?! Ah well, practical shoe choices had never been my forte, as my German friends often liked to remind me. At sixteen, my friends and I  ended up climbing the highest cliffs in Europe in 3 inchers! 




     Deciding to keep my mind off of my feet and not have images of my friend passing out on stage in Carnegie Hall from having locked her knees, my mind wandered back to the interesting characters behind me. After they began philosophizing about their elementary school regrets, “Boy was I angry when they up and switched our tracks! Then we was in school different times a year. All of a sudden there was, uh ,no way to see yourses friends, ‘ceptin’ Thanksgivin’ or somethun.”
Smiling to myself, all I could think was, “Boys. Lost ones at that.” They actually seemed nice enough, but it was clear from their conversation that the singular joy in their life came from their time spent gaming. 
     I hear your exasperated cries even now. Let me explain.  I am not against gaming in and of itself, nor do I think that every person who enjoys a good video game is an immature rascal, such as these two. What really gets me is how often I see people(guys and girls mind you), who quite simply have never grown up. They live in a world of fantasy, of great deeds, of being the fastest drivers, the best pilots, the most experienced warriors, without ever leaving the comfort of their living room and making a life for themselves. It is a world of achievements won entirely in their head. The best I can liken it to is a sort of Peter Pan reality.
 "I'll never grow up! I'll never go to school! Don't want to learn to be a parent, or recite a silly rule."


      Blame the media; blame our pleasure loving, need-to-be-entertained-at-all-times society, but no one put the controller in your hands, or forced you to turn the TV on. My personal vice is music. Turn it on and forget what's bothering you; go to a place where you just don’t have to deal with it for awhile. What got me concerned was when I noticed that I wasn't  listening to it as often when life was going well. I’m not against needing to escape every now and again and clear your head; each of us has different ways to do that.
 But I don’t see that anymore. 
I see a generation of people who refuse to live their lives, and it's a shame because we could really use them out there. We have created the ultimate breed of escapists. I’m sure to many of you I sound like a stuck up little prude, and maybe I am, but it saddens me in so many ways. I know so many girls in relationships with guys who have checked out. In the words of Switchfoot, "We were meant to live for so much more. This is your life. Are you who you want to be?" 
     I’ve talked to the girls often enough on these blogs about my concern for how we treat men and I don’t believe the way forward is criticism. However, I believe especially as Christian men, you are called to something so much higher, so much better. For a kingdom, we are horribly short of kings. Perhaps it’s because you haven’t had any examples of what a man looks like. Maybe your dad left home or treated your mother badly. Maybe the only men in your life were weak and demure. Perhaps you have only heard in church that Jesus was soft and kind and merciful. You’ve seen pictures of Him covered with crawling babies or holding a bunny or something…..Don’t laugh these pictures are out there!




 You know what?  Until I knew Jesus, I really thought that’s what He was like too. From the words of a Californian, “Oh my gosh He’s sooo not.” I’d stake my bet on it, that Jesus is the most manly man that ever existed. He was God in man. That puts our little “Avengers” cronies like Thor to shame. He was a carpenter, which means at the very least, he was ridiculously hard working. 
     He is creator, magnificence defined, the man of all hats, the magician who knows your mind, the guy whose last word actually means something and the one who’s still got control of this whole crazy world in the palm of His hand. He’s huge, impressive, shocking, and unpredictable and in the words of C.S. Lewis, “He’s not a tame lion.” My God likes adventure, likes freaking His disciples out by walking out to them on water, likes laughing at people’s foibles, and doesn’t take no for an answer. You know why? Cause He’s awesome like that.
      I see so many girls like myself who are practically he-shes, because we are constantly being forced into men’s roles because there's no one else to bridge the gap. What a shame! We’re really not made for that, you know? I’ve got hope for our guys, though. I know an awful lot of good ones to even out the bad, but they’re so beaten down, so unsure, unstable. They get accused of being brutes or chauvinists, oftentimes when they’re just being a dude! Of course, I don’t mean those brutal guys who go around beating women. Those are obviously the most cowardly of all. 

      I believe we women must encourage them in all of their great endeavors, but we can’t do it all alone! We need you. Yes, most of us are too proud to admit it, and the feminism movement has caused more grief than it's worth in some cases. We need your strength and your wisdom and cool headedness, (something many of us are not especially well known for.) We need you to hold us up, when we don’t think we can go on. We need you to be the leaders and thinkers, the brave doers of deeds.  Most of all, we need you to give us a glimpse of Jesus. We need you to put down the controllers, step away from the TV’s, stand up for us and become the men you were created to be. We need you to be the dad to your kids, the husband to your wife, the right man for your job. In short, we need you to grow up. Women aren't easy, I know. We're a trial even to each other :), but there are many of us who are out there rooting for you, praying for you, and believing that when you do this, you’ll change the world. Show us we're right and that our faith in you isn't for naught. And let all those great things you've accomplished in your head be nothing in comparison to the wonder that is your life. It's time for our lost boys to become found men.



Pictures courtesy of Neverpedia, Pinterest, faithmouse, and Disney's Peter Pan

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